sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
