Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
