Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
