And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
