just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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