i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize