And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
