why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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