Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
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