We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
My vagina just clenched in fear
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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