Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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