Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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