Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
