Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
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I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
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He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize