i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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