he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
it's like heaven, but drunker
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
