bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
He has the fingertips of a God
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