Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Randomize
