I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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