If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
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