I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
