He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Randomize
