when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
