I wish I could punch you in the face.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
