He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Thank you for not boning my boss.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
