haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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