Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Randomize
