hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
