Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Randomize
