You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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