i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize