just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize