i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
