Sry I called you an 8
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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