soooo we both peed the bed last night...
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
