he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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