Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
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