I wanna bring you to show and tell
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I lost the right to judge tonight
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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