the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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