That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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