i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
