tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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