Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating