she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
