More tranny stories later!
I don't think brook has ever known best
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
i came on her dog
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
