Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Randomize
