doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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