with your own penis?
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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