Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize