grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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