i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
